Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Changing the plan...

I have been avoiding my blog like the plague. My blog is where my weight-loss honesty hits me in the face. When FatHollie is hiding from SkinnyHollie, she avoids the blog. Blog = Truth.

Over the past week, I have been blogging in my head. Just now, tonight, have I decided to finally put it on the line. I am ready to change my plan... again. But this is a new plan... one I've never tried before.

A few months ago, I was given a book by a dear friend. I read the first few chapters, agreed with pretty much everything it said. Then I put it down, got busy, and forgot about it. Until about a week ago. I picked it back up, and I think it was meant for me to do so.

I rarely talk about my relationship with God on this blog. But I will today... just because my relationship with God is now going to coincide with my relationship with food and my weight loss journey.

Someone suggested this book to me in the comments section of my blog a while back, and then my friend bought it for me after I mentioned it several times. I ready the reviews, and it seemed like it would be profound. You see, my relationship with God has been an area of my life that I HAVE been working on during the past year. I am back in church, and have found a lot of friends and support there. For someone like me, having that kind of lifeline has been great. I basically have no family, and very few friends. So my church family is a big part of my life and my children's lives.

But before reading this book, I never really thought about leaning on a higher power for help with my weight loss journey. But I will now. I have officially asked the ladies in my Sunday school class to pray for me about this, and now I am putting it on here to make it official.

Chapter 6 of the book is titled, "Growing Close to God", and it really spoke to me. To the core.

"(this journey) is about learning to tell myself no and learning to make wiser choices daily. And somehow becoming a woman of self-discipline honors God and helps me live the godly characteristic of self-control."

"...when food is what Satan holds up in front of us and says, "You'll never be free from this battle. You will always bounce from feeling deprived when you're dieting to feeling guilty when you're splurging. Victory isn't possible. You aren't capable of self-control with food," we must see that its inappropriate consummation can be his lure to draw our heart into a place of defeat."

"I need power beyond what I can find on my own."

"Food can fill our stomachs but never our souls."

"...if we find that certain foods are impossible to walk away from...we can't or won't deny ourselves an unhealthy choice in order to make a healthier choice...then it's a clue we are being ruled by this food on some level."

Do you get the drift?

I have felt my brain changing, and I am already making better choices. I am not "back on plan", but I am getting there. I am ready to commit to making positive changes, even if it's just steps in the right direction. I am basically undertaking a spiritual and physical journey at the same time, and that thought is still scary to me. I now see clearly that it's Satan that tells me over and over that I can't get to my destination in either journey. But if I've learned anything, I've learned that Satan is a liar.

I can't count the people in my life that are just waiting for me to fail. Fail at being a good mom. Fail at my career. Fail at maintaining my household. Fail at being happy. Fail at being healthy. Sometimes it seems that everyone wants me to fail, and I let those thoughts play with my head. Sadly, because my own mother is one of my biggest critics, I have had a negative self-image and outlook about myself and my abilities for a long time.

I have made the decision to stop letting these people win! I fight so hard in every other aspect of my life, so now it's time to start fighting for my health. And really, it IS about health at this point. I will never have a bikini-perfect body. I don't even want to be skinny anymore. I want to be healthy, and I want to show my children that they can be healthy, too. Spiritually, mentally, and physically healthy.

It's time for me to believe in myself, and believe that God can help me get ANYWHERE I want to be. It's time for me to change the plan.


  1. Powerful post Hollie. It is such a struggle to connect that God wants to be Lord over ALL our life and that even means our food, health and weight. I have often struggled with this, knowing that food is in some ways my "idol" - something I consistently put before HIM. After all, when you think about something all the time... thats what I am doing. I still struggle with my lack of success in this area, and question God. - why. But it seems you have the answer here, it is Satan keeping us in total bondage to something that makes us miserable. Anyway, love you. Thanks for this!

  2. You are sooo right Hollie!! It is all a package together: spiritual, mental, and physical. I read the book in January and just finished watching the dvd's where Lysa T. teaches the principals from the book. The dvd's are wonderful too; she is very inspiring, wise, and motivating. Maybe your church can order them, and offer them? When I read it in January I highlighted the book in yellow. I am going back through it now, and highlighting different things that jump out at me in pink. I have been losing my mojo some this summer, and figure I need to refresh my memory! I am so excited for you to read it because I know it really inspires and motivates me. I am rooting for you, and I am praying for you! You can do it through His strength! You are a precious Jesus girl, and He loves you very much!

  3. It is so much a mental game, good for you for finding a new method of focus. I hope you find success in it.

    On a consumption/burn related note, have you considered simply counting calories? I eat just under my BMR and exercise everyday. It's been working really well, for me.

  4. Hey I just wanted to say good luck! I know the hardest part is starting.. If you believe in yourself though you will accomplish your fitness goals! It is a hard thing to do but worth every second. If you need any tips or any help let me know! I will gladly try my best.


  5. I would love for you to check out my blog sometime! http://80pounds40weeks.blogspot.com

    For now, I will share with you a verse I found when praying and beginning my own closer walk with God and weight loss journey...

    1 Corinthians 10:13
    No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (NIV)

    I look forward to watching you grow!!

  6. I'm finding that on my weight loss journey it's all about freedom from the lies of Satan. Some lies I've listened to all my life...so it's really hard to stop agreeing with them. But, freedom is more important and it's worth the fight. I think that a lot of people miss out on the fact that there is absolutely a spiritual side to weight loss, and when you ignore that, you're missing the whole foundation of the issue. There might be 1,000 people in this world that want you to fail...but God is on your side. And if he's for you, who can be against you?

  7. Amen. Why have I never connected the two before? I will be sure to check this book out. Maybe this is the missing piece to the puzzle. And God knows I need to get my relationship with him together. Thanks.

  8. Thank you for sharing. I am so excited for you.

  9. Hollie
    You can do it! Your faith, your friends and your desire to getting what you want will help you succeed. Have some powerful friends to support you, and let those that want you to fail slowly fade from your life. We are all here supporting you, because we know you can do it!

  10. Thanks Hollie. What an awesome post. I'll be praying for you! I've been following for a while now and you've inspired me to start my own blog! God bless you and your journey!
    Kara Lea

  11. Yes the hardest part in losing weight is just putting your feet on the ground and deciding that's it..I am losing weight. Take it one day at a time. Don't allow your mind to worry and even think about tommorrow, but just focus on today. And yes, I totally agree that having God first place in your life is critical to any real lasting success in life.

  12. Wow! Very deep. I loved this post! You have do have some great friends here too, their comments are very encouraging.

    Keep up the good work!

  13. I had the same problem in the beginning but as soon as i realised that God can help me, not as in talking or revelating to me but as in knowing that there is something somewhere helping me get over this and which each pound i lost i was getting closer and closer to God because i knew he was helping and motivating me. i was also thinking of changing my diet in the beginning when i found http://biggestloserclub.com.au/ and i saw those meal replacements and also i thought that being part of a community will help me lose weight fast. Good luck with your diet and keep inspiring people:)

  14. i like your all Changing plans thanks for shear its.

  15. My WW suggested this book to me sometime ago, right before I too fell off the wagon. I have always known that it was a conncection between my realtionship with food to my realtionship with God...I also include my realtionship with money. For me it is all connected. That is the reason I started my blog too, I wanted to log my jorney...my truth transformation.

    Thank you for being transparent in your journey.

  16. I just started my weight loss journey to lose 100 pounds in 14 months by my 40th birthday. Thanks for this post about this book, I plan to check it out.

    Love your blog!! Great inspiration :)

  17. Hello holly,Ive been reading your blog and canthelp but,say that your on the right track.The decision to let god or spirit come into your life and guide you to the place or places you want to go or be at in your life right now today is having gratitude .I feel that when we come to the point in our lives where nothing seems to work anymore,losing weight,satisfactory with our jobs ,our family.Even starting to hate the wy we look and feel towards ourselves and others.I believe God is telling us to sit down in a silent place and look within for our answers.Yes Iam a firm believer that he can help us lose weight ,become wealthy or what ever it is we desire.After all,it is he who created us not ourselves.So ask for guidance in all your needs and they will be answered.I too am on the same journey of health and awarness in spirituality and living a prosperous life.May you have success in all that you seek.Health and Wealth to you!

  18. I just found you blog, but I think I'm definitely going to have to grab a copy of this book.

    Thanks :)

  19. Incredibly timely document mainly because I am looking to shed pounds in advance of the holidays to ensure I will be able to search my best once i check out my family members. Such strategies happen to be sure towards arrive around hand.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.