Wednesday, March 24, 2010


I have been having so many cravings today! This is a first since starting Medifast, so I am just wanting to scream. It all started with reading Kath Eats Real Food. The oatmeal looked so good, and I thought, "Wow... I miss my pumpkin oatmeal." I could actually taste it. I miss fruit. I want strawberries and watermelon. I want pizza - good pizza, not the cheap stuff. I also want sweet potato fries and an almond butter and jelly sandwich on soft bread. The list goes on and on... THEN I started this text conversation with my sis-in-law about home-cooked, southern meals she cooks...I wasn't supposed to eat until 1 p.m. but I ate at about 12:20 p.m. just to take the edge off. I thought if I could fill up with good stuff it would help me from crashing.

I don't want to crash... I really want this to pass. The scale is holding steady at 18.8 lbs. lost. It was up a little yesterday, but back down today. I desperately want to have another 1.2 lbs gone by Friday so I can be at 20 lbs. gone. I really want to end the month of March in the 270's. I have to stay on plan!

I must have been on crack when I was making plans to get back into the gym and to start walking yesterday. My daughter had tutoring - which was unexpected since she just told me the day before that she wasn't going to go to tutoring anymore. So, I had just enough time to leave work, go home and change my youngest into her soccer clothes and change my clothes, and go pick up big sister. I went straight from her school to the soccer field, dropped her off, then went to the baby's practice, then BACK to the oldest child's practice. It was almost 8 p.m. before we got home. I spent the next hour or so getting their dinner and baths and putting them to bed. Where is MY time, you ask? It doesn't exist. Not now, at least.

Today and tomorrow looks like they are gonna be repeats of yesterday. MAYBE I can get some walking in on Friday - the day before the 5K. Maybe I can get to the gym this weekend... upper body one day, lower body the next. Better than nothing, right? I wanna go back to Florida... This single-parent shit if for the BIRDS. I need help, or enough money to BUY some! Sometimes I feel like I am fighting a losing battle.